Kiely Williams, eine us-amerikanische Sängerin, bejubelt in ihrem Song „Spectacular“ Sex ohne Erinnerung.
Die Sache klingt dann ungefähr so:
Last night I was drunk
I don‘t remember much
But what I do constant pictures
Thats how going I was
But he was tall and he was buying
So I gave him a trying
Said he was like a stallion
And the man wasn‘t lying
Last I remember I was face down
Ass up, clothes off, broke off, dozed off
Even though I‘m not sure of his name
He could get it again if he wanted
Cause the sex was spectacular
You can say what you want but
You can call me a slut but
What he did to me last night felt so good
I must have been on drugs
I hope he used a rubber
Or I‘mma be in trouble
Ein guter Kommentar zu dem Song findet sich auf Shakesville
Because her song isn‘t, after all, about a „twenty-something who goes out and gets a little bit too drunk and goes home with a guy whose name she can‘t quite remember.“ Her song is about a woman who „dozed off“ and „blacked out“ and „must have been on drugs“ because she can‘t even remember whether the man she was with used a condom. That’s not a booze-fueled one-night-stand. That’s a rape.
Even if someone is sober enough to consent and gives enthusiastic consent for sexual activity (an issue around which the song skirts), continuing to „have sex“ with a sleeping or unconscious person is rape. Consent can be withdrawn at any point during a sexual act, and ergo the ability to withdraw consent is part of a consensual sex act. Consent isn‘t an on-off switch. Consent is an active entity.
The idea that saying „yes“ means saying yes to everything no matter what happens is a narrative of the rape culture.
Sehr treffend formuliert auch Jaz auf RH Reality Check
Also, she is completely nonchalant about the fact that she doesn‘t know if her partner used a condom but hopes so because that could cause her „trouble.“ Yes, Kiely, you could end up with a sexually transmitted infection or an unintended pregnancy (or both). So in this scenario, you don‘t know this guy’s name, or anything about him, except that he bought you lots of alcohol and that you wanted to run out of his home as fast as possible (which sounds like regret and embarrassment). It couldn‘t have been that spectacular then.
Ich denke auch, dass die positive Darstellung eines solchen Erlebnisses nicht unproblematisch ist. Denn leider leben wir immer noch in einer Welt in der einige Männer versuchen, sich Frauen mit Alkohol und Drogen den Körper gefügig zu machen und ihnen ihre Entscheidungsfähigkeit „will ich überhaupt Sex mit dieser Person“ zu rauben.
Die Frau sagt dann vielleicht nicht mehr „Nein“, Vergewaltigung bleibt es aber trotzdem.